Dear Viewers, today is the 3rd of July, and this is your afternoon infusion of funny, interesting, and bizarre junk going on in this world that we share. Today I learned that an Italian scientist believes that human technology is only two years away from a successful human head transplant. This sounds wonderful to me, because I’ll never have to work out again! Rather than take bogus diet supplements that suppress appetite, I’ll just pay a few million bucks to have my head put on Jessica Alba’s body. Enough about that, let’s get down to business.
Obama Campaign Parody
Interesting for: 15 seconds
Slightly more interesting than a crayfish massacre
Lies. Yeah, that’s how tax paying American feel about this right now.
Hands down best droid in the galaxy.
At least we don’t have to any more.
Anthony Hopkins? On the movie set, they call him Tony.
Sexy for: 5-30 years depending upon meth usage
Not quite as sexy as a H2O
Society’s laws say, “NO” adults cannot lawfully make the bed boogie with minors. Nature tells us, however, that the sooner we make that bed boogie, the better. Hot yes, but not as hot as….
A Simpleton’s Classification of the Kangaroo
Interesting for: The time it takes to zip and button your pants
Slightly more interesting than a gay little snake
Wow! Good job Timmy! A for you on the biology test! But sorry, you earn an F on the English test. See you said, “When you think about it, a Kangaroo is just a T-Rex Deer.” What you should have said was, “When I think about it…” I am not an idiot, therefore I have never thought that a kangaroo is a T-Rex deer.
F.Y.I. these two sentences demonstrating the correct usage of ‘I’ and ‘you’:
“When I think about it, a penis is what I use to have sex with women and pee.”
“When you think about it, a penis just a lollipop that you can’t reach with your own mouth.”
Your Daily Morning Randomness